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Original Post:

I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off. I ran over and yelled "Stop! Don't do it!"

"Why shouldn't I?" he said.

I said "There's so much to live for!"

He replied "No, there isn't. Life is pointless."

Quickly trying to find some common ground, I asked "Are you religious or atheist?"

He said "Religious."

I said "So am I! Are you Christian or Buddhist or something?"

He said "Christian."

I said "So am I! Are you Catholic or Protestant?"

He said "Protestant."

I said "So am I! Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?"

He said "Baptist."

I said "So am I! Are you Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?"

He said "Baptist Church of God."

I said "So am I! Are you original Baptist Church of God or Reformed Baptist Church of God?"

He said "Reformed Baptist Church of God."

I said "So am I! Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1915?"

He said "Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1915."

I said "Die heathen scum!" and pushed him off the bridge.